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Nobody's Behind Bars Yet…

We asked you to report back with your wildest travel anecdotes. From lap dances to fake British accents, you didn't disappoint.

our winner swam for it!
A devil of a swim
We five old friends celebrate birthdays together. One time, we went to Texas to see ancient Indian drawings on a cliff by the Devils River. The water where we intended to cross was too swift and too high. We scouted around for a calmer spot and then stripped to our bras and undies, tied our clothes on our heads, and swam for it. This was in the dead of winter, and we weren't so lithe and lean anymore—we were all grandmothers! Beverly Cohle, New Braunfels, Tex.

Life jackets don't provide that much coverage…
In Kona, Hawaii, my friends and I wanted to go parasailing. We asked two cute guys running a boat how much it would be. Seeing that we were six young ladies, they said, "It's free if you go topless." We were hesitant, but when we realized that we'd be wearing life vests, we decided to go for it. We went up in pairs. When it was my turn, I looked at my best friend and asked, "When will we get another chance to say we've gone parasailing naked?" She answered with a knowing smile. So we dropped our swimsuit bottoms and sailed into the sky in nothing but our birthday suits (and life vests, of course). No doubt the craziest thing we've ever done. Melissa Yepes, Woodland Hills, Calif.

Don't try pole dancing
My friends Donna, Bev, and Jenny and I recently went to Las Vegas. Bev's husband had just been to a strip club, which made Bev a little angry, so she figured that we should go to one, too. A man and his wife there decided that we needed a lap dance. As the gal was dancing for me, Donna laughed so hard that she about fell off her chair. The gal looked at Donna and said, "What's so funny? You're next." She pushed Donna back in the chair and started dancing. When the dancer went on break, she came to talk with us. We asked her how she got such a nice body, and she told us that she did a bunch of squats every day. So when we got home, Bev tried to do some squats—she could hardly walk for a week. Heidi Lakey, Chehalis, Wash.

"Hi, I'm Posh Spice"
Friends and I rented a limo for a girls' night out in Washington, D.C., and made a pact to use British accents and pretend we were a Euro-pop group. We didn't think anyone would believe us, but, weirdly, they did. We got free meals at Planet Hollywood, posed for photos with the staff—even signed autographs! We felt guilty (and left a big tip), but I'd never take back our night out as celebrities. Lauren Stone, Norman, Okla.

Guess they don't snore
Leaving for a three-week trip to Europe, my best friend and I had a few margaritas in the airport bar. These guys from Texas insisted on teaching us the two-step. We were having so much fun that we didn't hear the first several boarding calls and barely made the flight. Yes, we were tipsy…OK, more than that. But we weren't done yet. We had one more glass of wine with dinner and then passed out for the rest of the nine-hour trip. After we woke up, we were reliving the events when a man behind us said, "Oh, good—you're alive. You were so rowdy when you got on the plane that we all thought you might be dead since it's been so quiet." Kyle McNichols, Newport Beach, Calif.

Purell wasn't invented yet
My wackiest trip is also one of my oldest. Three friends and I went to Greece in 1978. In Corinth, two of them decided to go swimming. They jumped in the sea and were having a great time when a local man came up to my friend and me on land to let us know that our pals were swimming in a sewage area. When they heard the news, they jumped out of the water and ran to the train station to clean up as much as possible. We made them sit far away from us for the rest of the day. Jennifer Mills, The Woodlands, Tex.

We should try that next time
On a spa trip to Mexico, one of my girlfriends got bitten by an insect. After medical treatment, she was deemed OK—though her leg was still swollen—and we enjoyed the rest of our vacation. At the airport, we couldn't find her a wheelchair, so we grabbed a hand truck, and an airport employee rolled her past the long lines. She even got upgraded to first class. Karen Pinsonneault, Williamsport, Pa.

Hope the tattoo was on your list
At 39, my girlfriend and I decided to do 40 things we had never done, all before we turned 40. One thing was to run a race, and she found a three-mile race in Madison, Wis., where we had gone to college. We raised money for cancer research and both finished the race. Afterwards, we passed a tattoo parlor and decided to get a tattoo. We had a fun-filled day and felt like we were back in college. Jill Lenz, Pewaukee, Wis.

Gives new meaning to the term "fish food"
My girlfriend loves to help people and still visits Sri Lankan victims of the 2004 tsunami. Once, we were in Israel with a bunch of friends, and my friend told us about Sri Lanka. Another friend offered $1,000 toward her cause if she'd jump into the sea among the fish swarming at feeding time. Several other diners put up money for her cause too. Fully dressed for dinner, she got up from the table and, with the entire restaurant cheering her on, jumped into the sea among dozens of large fish. She didn't get bitten, and she raised $2,500 for Sri Lanka. Susan McCarthy, Newport Beach, Calif.

Exactly how many shots did you have?
Samantha and Mikalyn (names changed to protect the now-married women) and I went to Huatulco, Mexico. The first night, I suggested an adult version of truth or dare, which started with tequila shots and embarrassing questions. Then Samantha took a dare: She had to strip down to a thong and order room service. We had such a good laugh at the 20-something waiter's reaction that Mikalyn also took a dare. She had to strip down to a thong, tie fruit over her breasts, and go milk one of the goats we had seen on the beach. She made it there without being noticed and approached a goat. When the goat smelled the fruit, it went crazy trying to get it, and Mikalyn ran away. She jumped into the pool and lost her top. Amazingly enough—goats hate water—the goat jumped in, too. The distressed bleats brought out the waiter and another man, who fished the goat out of the pool. The manager kicked us out in the middle of the night. Now that was a good time. Suzette Ballew, Austin, Tex.

 
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